Ladies Night

It's Friday night, and I have had a long week. Dave has been busy installing a new operating system on one of our numerous laptops, so I decided I would treat myself to a chick flick. I ended up ordering "For Colored Girls" upon the recommendation from my mother and sister. It was a great film, and I too recommend it, it was well done. But the film itself is not what I want to talk about.

The film touches on several issues women sometimes have to endure, including rape, abortion, suicide, and domestic violence. Throughout the film, these issues are addressed, with I think in the attempt to give women hope, strength and power. I agree that this is a positive message-- what I don't understand is why we need this message in the first place.

I think we can all agree that one of the fundamental differences between the human male and human female is the way in which our minds function. Males tend to process emotion in a more linear, direct way, while women tend to analyze and understand our emotions in a different sense. I am not claiming that either way is superior to the other, just illustrating that they are different.

Women "feel" while men "think". Or at least thats the best way I can describe my point here. What I don't understand, is how for hundreds of years, in every culture, we have decided that "feeling" equals a weakness.

And before you jump to conclusions, blaming the media, men and society, I have to say--- really, ladies? We have to stop blaming an outside source. The media didn't make us this way, the images of thin blondes with smokey eyes and big boobs may bombard us on a constant basis-- but WE are letting it get to us. WE are ultimately responsible for the ways WE CHOOSE to process those images.  Men are (collectively as a whole) not trying to keep us in our place, make us feel like we are less, we are processing their actions to mean that, and again, letting it get to us. Society is not telling us we are the weaker sex, WE are.

When I am upset, I cry. I release my strong emotion in the form of tears. When Dave gets upset, he punches the door frame. We are both doing the same thing. Releasing our emotions. Our anger, fear, love, hate, confusion, sadness and frustrations. We all feel them, and we each (as individuals) release them in our own ways. My way is not superior to yours, and yours is not superior to mine.

Ladies, we are stronger than this. You are strong enough to make a difficult decision, and realize it was for the best. Be proud of yourself for having the courage to make that decision and stand by it. Don't spend the rest of your life beating yourself up from the inside out because you have convinced yourself that you are weak. Get ahold of yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror-- and allow yourself to actually see yourself! I know, it's hard-- you only see what you are not or what you wish you could be. We need to stop the madness.

We are stronger than this. If someone, anyone has done something to you that is unacceptable, fight back. Be proud of your instinct to fight to the death. Don't second guess your instinct. You are just as capable of fighting as everyone else. If you lose the actual fight, don't give up, fight for the rest of your life, fight to be the strong woman you are meant to be. You are capable of being that woman you wish you saw in the mirror.

We are stronger than this. Stop the drama. All that day in day out little stuff that clouds your decisions and thoughts. It doesn't matter. Be proud of yourself that you can realize this, and change it.

We are not weaker. We are equal. Start acting like it. We don't have to be anything than what we already are, so please, realize this and be yourself, fight for yourself.

Are there situations you may have no control over? Yes. Are there times when physically speaking you may be weaker than your opponent? Yes. Are there times when you will lose? Yes. Does this mean you should let it kill you slowly from the inside for the rest of your life? NO.

I'm just frustrated, and this time I'm releasing it via blog. I keep hearing stories of women being brutally raped, or beaten. This past week, a woman was picked up by two police officers near my neighborhood, and they took her home-- only to then both rape her while she screamed. This story makes me unbelievably angry and frustrated and -- disgusted, on multiple levels. I feel terrible for her. But I want her to realize her strength to get through this, and realize her self, and not allow it to destroy her from the inside. She is stronger than that. She, I imagine, is rather upset. Good, I hope she is able to release it all and be stronger from now on. She has the power to be a strong woman, and I hope she chooses to be.

Ladies-- please. We don't need a movie to tell us we can be strong and powerful-- we already are.